Wednesday, November 30, 2005

unveiling of the uninspired

hallelujah, i have seen the light!!


(don't worry i only look like this on stage)

well - ok... no, not really. i am just trying to crash face first into fiction and come out standing proud. i told monkey 0 that he inspired me and this is the moment he didn't even know he was waiting for.

Ladies! Gentlemen! and the rest of you aqua-dwelling Miscreants! step right up and see the amazing - no - the astounding - (at the very least, the mildly amusing) "from the chaos journals"!! mysfit's brand-new and very own scratch fiction site!

'what is scratch fiction?' you ask.

'what are the chaos journals?'

'where are my shoes?' you wonder.

well, my dear little fishies, all these answers and more will be found sometime in the near-aquatic ataxic future (a.k.a., somewhere between the fish and chaos) so keep your eye turned to these small bites of virtuosity and the color green!!

in the meantime, i will answer a few of the questions i know you are drowning to ask.

'why are you leaving the fish?'
(jenn see, darling, do not be mad at me, i am not abandoning the fish - i am merely expanding my reach)

'why not write fiction for the fish?'
at first i toyed with the idea of keeping the scratch fiction here, where the side-bar river of links spills our fishes' virtual wanderings to the attention of those who's fish-following brings them to our rocky shores. but i want whatever crap that i tap out kept together to play with and follow as i feel like it.

'where did this come from'
as i said - it's all monkey 0's fault.

I NEEED TO WRITE. i can feel the words, ideas, characters yelling at me from the back of my mind, but they have become so muffled and weighed down in rl-shit (that's real-life, for the uninitiated) . so, stuck in the middle of two novels, a number of short stories (all deadends) and now, nanowrimo found me stuck at the end of november at like a 5k word-count with nothing left to write (so much for that idea, oh well there's always next year), i have decided that a site to which i dedicate only 15mins of forehead space to at any given time, whenever the fey mood takes me is a good thing.

it's a good thing and it's all monkey 0's fault.

'where will you begin?'
i thought you'd never ask. i was going to wait until i had redesigned the template, but i guess it'll just evolve with the writing - it's all about the words anyways, right?
to get started (remember i am not lazy, just uninspired) i decided to explore some random plot generators to see if the net had caught something to spark the forest fire - or at least amuse me for a while.


The following came from the random plot generator from Teresa Nielsen Hayden, an editor who has recently been doing some work for Tor Books.

Advice for the Evil Overlord:
I will never accept a challenge from the hero.
Advice for the Hero:
If I am captured by the Evil Overlord and escape, I will assume that he is tracking me in some manner. If I am going to the hidden rebel base, I'll first go to an alternate location, change clothing, equipment, and means of transportation, and then go to the hidden rebel base.
Advice for the Bad Auxiliary Character (Legion of Doom Troops):
Don't attack the hero alone or in pairs. The Evil Overlord hired a million of you for a reason.
Advice for the Good Auxiliary Character (Innocent Bystander):
Do not run back to get your teddy bear or puppy.
Further Evil (Advice for the Evil Empress):
I will learn the various arts of self defense and not rely solely on muscular minions to protect me.

Murphy's Laws of Combat:
-A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.
-The most dangerous thing in the world is a Second Lieutenant with a map and a compass. -The worse the weather, the more you are required to be out in it.
-The bursting radius of a grenade is always one foot greater than your jumping range.


this one is still amusing me. So You've Decided to Be Evil is a "step-by-step guide to joining the forces of evil". it has everything the modern villain needs to think about in order to break into the world of complete megalomania and super-villainous. from what to wear to what to look for in a thug to where to build your secret lair. It's got everything!


for those a bit more mad-lib inclined - give this horror plot generator a shot.



well, seen you soon - somewhere between chaos and the fish.
love, mysfit

12 little fish:

Blogger Daniel Heath swam up to say...

oh, I knew.

I knew I was waiting.

and if you get lonely on this path of righteousness, Chemical Billy just posted some excellent advice on how to defeat scratch-fiction block.

(you are the first person, mysfit, who I do not know irl, who has taken up the scratch fiction meme; I am honored, and may it serve you as well as it has served me.)

4:39 PM  
Blogger anne swam up to say...

Hurray is all I have to say!
(That's a lie, there was a lot more. I censored myself in the nick of time.)

5:44 PM  
Blogger tescosuicide swam up to say...

Excellent, bravo and the like -with no female backing vocals!

9:23 PM  
Blogger mysfit swam up to say...

whew, i was worried for a moment anne...

you know tesco, i could do without your golfclaps...

monkey... :P

12:28 AM  
Blogger Carl V. swam up to say...

Congrats on being willing to try something new. Look forward to seeing where this leads you and reading some interesting stuff along the way!

8:24 AM  
Blogger mysfit swam up to say...

thanks carl, i look forward to seeing what you think of my random dibbles.

monkey, i only hopw i can do the genre :P justice

10:10 AM  
Blogger jason evans swam up to say...

Looking forward to visiting, mysfit!

12:45 PM  
Blogger tescosuicide swam up to say...

Golf clapping! lol

10:56 PM  
Blogger banzai cat swam up to say...

Bravo indeed, miss mysfit! :-)

Glad to hear you've been bitten by the writing bug. And my sympathies also. ;-)

"i have decided that a site to which i dedicate only 15mins of forehead space to at any given time, whenever the fey mood takes me is a good thing."

And I know EXACTLY what you mean.

2:14 AM  
Blogger transience swam up to say...

awesome you are, expanding your reach. i trust that there'll be more fishie and un-fishie sides revealed.

3:17 AM  
Blogger mysfit swam up to say...

jason, i am looking forward to you visiting!

tesco, yes, you know what i mean :)

cat, :P i thank you for both your congrats and you sympathies i need both - and the writing bug bit me a longtime ago, the bite is quite swollen and pus filled now, i'm hoping to spill some of in over into chaos :) it's the only way i get better.

unfortunately transience, as you may well see, all my sides are fishy.

10:31 AM  
Blogger MrGonSings swam up to say...

best of lucks in this new challenge!

6:50 PM  

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